Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Today......i struggling....n worrying....

Today, is today............
Tomorrow, is tomorrow.....
Just want to let out my some unstable mood.....actually i decided to study form 6 is not to burden my parents... due to this i hv make a decison to study form 6...but than...
i realize form 6 getting hader n harder...friends around me complain that really hard n study like a hell....teacher rush the syallbus n my mind came out so many immense quistion mark....OMG...some havnt b digested new things come to me again....some luckly go for collage....some change stream...even some break of to study form 6.......

Form me.....not enough 3 months alrdy be tired of chasing syallbus....tution.....study...routine the same thing....damn boring.....damn not good.....always study study damn unhealthy.....my friends all go chase their dream....different school....wah....
In conclusion....i adapt the environment but my mind hvnt adapt this environment yet.......
Sometimes nid to do the things that i reluctant to do.......for instance,do homework....waliao....if i din din o try my homework i really duno n dun understand the syallbus.....
N somemore got 5 tuition........wakau.....i gona die die die....almost exhausted....if i not to tuition i know i really cant follow up wat teacher teach..........i almost delirium....

In addition,i anticipate my life will change better thn this....nid to balance my mood n my healthy.....not ec o.......i duno weather i got gv myself too much tension.....but i feel that i try to relex myself....i rememberd that this monday....sleep at class....after the vocation i totally tired......until now.....headache....stomachache.....perhaps its the symptom of presure....i not really like my class.....cause peer presure....all of them study study n study.....n i sure got ppl "badder" thn me lah......that y i try yo make myself calm down let out my unstabilize mood.......

I'm a person that "happy-go-luckly" in apperently...inside my heart.....quit intricate.....
Neither hedonistic nor passive thinker......just as ordinary person....sometimes passive sometimes optimist...just depand on my mood......erm......if i'm alone i will feel lonely....on the other hand....sometimes i enjoy alone....haha izzit contradictive?? ya....
If some thing happened to my i would like to stay alone to visualize,how n why.......
hmm......recently i'm sedentary to do anything....less involved in event....although i possess anyhings....i'm consider happiness...but i feel void inside my heart(alrdy accumulated long time ago)u knw why??
I nid God.....

Tell the truth I got another action to let out my temper.....
yell somebody...do something that unsual...bla bla bla...many....u ask my friends thn u will know......Its hard to reveal my deep side...my problem...but i'm a person that anything write on the face....u can know......hmm.......getting mature...my disguising getting better.....^^
try yo conceal somethigs purposely getting bad feel,excruciatingly.....
Haiz.....wat a humdrum environment.......idle study......
In reality.....i nid to face n do it......more suffer i nid to overcome it......
More challanging more interesting......more fierce to face it......i trust myself i'm not easy to unnerve not easy break of this challanging......i will do it n face my situation sturdyly......pray to God......just can pray.....i know i'm weak....hope God can hear my pray....got time i will share a testimony to u all........
In conclusion i struggling wonder i want caontinue my study o changr stream.....n wat i worry is my future.....bt i hv decided in here.....i will do it until i conquer all the problems.....
till here ....later nid to study again.......be4,nid to do facial......^^
beauty is not the only authority of gals o women....boys nid it too......^^

2 comments:

めぐみ said...

really long post larh...
my eyes getting blur dy~
as a fren...i cant tell you wat to do~
i cant help you out of this situation...*i'm worse enough in science stream,cant help*
i cant give you money to fled from form 6...
BUT...i got my wide-opened-ears here...
right here...you can tell me wat u wan~
maybe i really cant have any damn good advice...
but it's really help when you throw everything out than keeping inside...ya...
rmb...i'm here ya...my fren~

L said...

Thx u 1st ya~!!